I am fire.

Wind is rubbish, you're like a fart.

Notes

This is how it went down

Mother:
You owe me eighty five pound though!
Me:
Yes, you've already shouted at me for it numerous times.
Mother:
I wanted to buy a coat this month but now I can't!
Me:
That's silly, you can't re-have a go at me because of that. Thats like for example, you breaking my tennis racket and me shouting at you, but then also having the right to shout at you every time wimbledon is on!